If you want fancy, you'll get fancy SH
by ShilohHolmes
Summary: John just wants to have a nice dinner with Sarah at his flat. Sherlock has to complicate things. Short Fanfic told through text messages.
1. Chapter 1

Hey guys:) I got bored at school and decided to write down a series of text messages between John and Sherlock. I guess it just evolved into this:) I plan on it being three chapters :) Please review if you enjoy the story, or if you want to give me any tips or pointers. If enough people like it, I might write another one:) –Shiloh

Disclaimer: I do not own Sherlock.

If you want fancy, you'll get fancy. –SH

5:12 Friday April 13

Conversation between John Watson and Sherlock Holmes

Sherlock: Where are you? –SH

John: Why does it matter?

Sherlock: Why won't you tell me?-SH

John: Why do you care?

Sherlock: I don't. –SH

John: Then why did you ask?

Sherlock: Would you just answer the bloody question.-SH

John: I'm at lunch with Sarah.

Sherlock: I should have known. –SH

John: Are you telling me that the world's only consulting detective couldn't figure out where I was?

Sherlock: Am. –SH

John: Huh?

Sherlock: You said, and I quote: "Are you telling me that the world's only consulting detective couldn't figure out where I was?" You should have used am. Where I am. –SH

John: What are you? The grammar police?

Sherlock: Of course not. I am a grammar detective. –SH

John: That was incredibly cheesy.

Sherlock: I thought it was creative.

John: Aren't you the one who only cares about logic.

Sherlock: Maybe. –SH

John: I thought so.

Sherlock: I know. –SH

John: What do you mean?

Sherlock: I can read your mind. –SH

John: And I'm the idiot?

Sherlock: Yes.

Sherlock: John, you know that it was not meant to be an insult. Almost everyone is. Haven't we been over this? –SH

Sherlock: So now you're ignoring me? –SH

John: You tell me. I thought you could read my mind.

Sherlock: It's called a joke. –SH

John: :O

Sherlock: What?

John: The great Sherlock Holmes actually has a since of humor?

Sherlock: Very funny. –SH

John: I thought it was hilarious.

Sherlock: You would be the only one who would find it remotely humorous. –SH

John: Not true. Sarah thinks that it was funny.

Sherlock: Whatever. –SH

John: Would you mind if Sarah comes over for dinner?

Sherlock: Do I have a say in the matter? –SH

John: No. What do we have in the pantry?

Sherlock: I hesitate to articulate in fear I may deviate upon the highest degree of accuracy. –SH

John: ?

Sherlock: It means idk. –SH

John: Could you run to the store and pick something up?

Sherlock: I could. –SH

John: Please, Sherlock.

Sherlock: I'll take care of it. –SH

John: That isn't very reassuring. I actually want something fancy. Oh, and clean up the flat.

Sherlock: So you just assume that anything I would pick out wouldn't be fancy. –SH

John: That's not what I, well yes, that's exactly what I meant.

Sherlock: If you want fancy, you'll get fancy. –SH

John: I'm scared.

John: Sherlock?


	2. Chapter 2

Hope everyone enjoyed the first chapter. Here is the second one. This one is between our two favorite brothers. This is a revised version of the second chapter. JudasFm was kind enough to point out one of my mistakes . Thanks!–Shiloh

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock.

5:43 Friday April 13

Conversation between Sherlock and Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Hello brother mine. –SH

Mycroft: What do you want? –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: How do you know that I want something? You are incredible when making deductions brother dear. –SH

Mycroft: Really Sherlock, you know that flattery has absolutely no effect on me. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: What if it comes from your little brother? –SH

Mycroft: Cut the crap and get to the point. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Would you arrange an incredibly fancy dinner for two pathetic love birds? –SH

Mycroft: I would love to… -Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: What's the catch? –SH

Mycroft: How did you know that there would be a catch? You are incredible when making deductions brother dear. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: You are so clever. –SH

Mycroft: You would have to direct your full attention on the next case I present to you, and spend Christmas with Mummy and I. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Two favors for one? That hardly seems fair. –SH

Mycroft: Would you like to prepare a dinner for the good doctor and his date? I would love to see how you would decorate the flat. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: It's funny how you assume that the dinner is for John, and not me. –SH

Mycroft: The day you get a date will be the day I dye my hair purple. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Sign me up for an online dating website. I'm serious. –SH

Mycroft: I can see it now: Sherlock Holmes: Single Sociopath

Occupation: Consulting detective

Enjoys: Solving crimes, playing the violin in the early hours of the morning, and shooting the wall.

Dislikes: People, noise, and happiness. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: I don't dislike happiness, it dislikes me. –SH

Mycroft: So do we have a deal? –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Fine. But only if you go overboard. I want doves. –SH

Mycroft: Doves? –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: The birds. John wanted fancy, and he's going to get it. –SH

Mycroft: He's going to hate you. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Exactly. –SH

Mycroft: You should be more careful. He is your only friend. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Umm, excuse me but Yorik and I are very close. –SH

Mycroft: Alright, doves. Any other requests. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Live music, elegant surroundings, a five star meal. –SH

Mycroft: Where is this supposed to take place? –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: I don't know a pavilion? Invite some of your government buildings. –SH

Mycroft: So it's to be a formal gathering? –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Yes. –SH

Mycroft: Will you be attending? –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: I might drop by. Just to see his face. –SH

Mycroft: And you want me to arrange this in less than three hours? –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: If anyone can do it, you can. –SH

Mycroft: Why thank you. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: Do you have the address yet? I need to text John. –SH

Mycroft: 3729 W Radeline Street. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: That was fast. You've already booked the pavilion? –SH

Mycroft: Yes, that part was easy. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: What's the hard part? –SH

Mycroft: The guests. –Mycroft Holmes

Sherlock: You don't have to invite a lot of them. In fact, you can hire actors if you want. I just want him to be surrounded by classy people who reek of hubris. Not that your friends do. –SH

Mycroft: Alright. We have a deal. Hope to see you there. 7:30. –Mycroft Holmes


	3. Chapter 3

And the final chapter:) Thanks so much for reading and if you did, reviewing. Have a great day. –Shiloh

Disclaimer: I don't own Sherlock.

6:12 Friday April 13

Conversation between Sherlock Holmes and John Watson

Sherlock: Be at 3729 West Radeline Street by 7:30. –SH

John: What, why?

Sherlock: You have a dinner reservation. –SH

John: Dinner reservation? Sherlock, I just wanted to have a nice meal with Sarah at our flat. What restaurant is our reservation at?

Sherlock: Umm, Mycroft's Marvelous Meals? –SH

John: Excuse me?

Sherlock: You didn't give me enough time to generate a creative title. –SH

John: Really Sherlock, what have you done?

Sherlock: It's a surprise.

John: I'm not going.

Sherlock: That's fine, you can join Yorik, Joe, and myself for dinner. –SH

John: Joe?

Sherlock: We met at the morgue. –SH

John: You don't mean…

Sherlock:

John: I'm taking her out to dinner.

Sherlock: No. You're either going to Radeline Street or dinning with me. –SH

John: Who says?

Sherlock: I do. –SH

John: What are you going to do about it?

Sherlock: I'll have Mycroft kidnap you. -SH

John: You wouldn't!

Sherlock: Try me. –SH

10:56 Friday April 13

Conversation between John Watson and Sherlock Holmes

John: I hate you.

Sherlock: How was dinner? –SH

John: Oh it was GREAT. I was surprised that you didn't show.

Sherlock: I had Mycroft take pictures. –SH

John: When I get home, I'm going to kill you.

Sherlock: Is Sarah with you? –SH

John: Yes.

Sherlock: You wouldn't. –SH

John: Oh, I can assure you that I would. That I am. Sarah agreed to sit on you while I bash that big head of yours in with a bat.

Sherlock: Aluminum or composite? –SH

John: Which do your prefer.

Sherlock: Composite. –SH

John: I'll make sure that it's aluminum.

Sherlock: How rude. –SH

John: I try my best.

Sherlock: What if I'm not home when you arrive? –SH

John: Where are you going to go? You don't have any friends.

Sherlock: Must I remind everyone of Yorik! –SH

John: Get a life.

Sherlock: Hurtful. I was thinking about calling for a cab. Maybe I'll get lucky, and the driver will be a serial killer. –SH

John: Your chance of survival would be higher with him.

Sherlock: Is that a threat? –SH

John: Yes. Obviously.

Sherlock: I hear your footsteps. –SH

John: Prepare to die.


End file.
